Difference between Love & Lust.
There is a well-known four-letter “L” word that defines many romantic relationships. However, there’s another four-letter “L” word that sneaks into our relationships fairly often as well.
The two words are Love and lust. Both are similar yet very different types of attraction. Figuring out whether your romantic feelings come from lust or love can be challenging, but with a deeper understanding of each of these words, you will be able to spot the difference.
Lust is looking at a person and feeling both a strong sexual attraction and a pull toward imaginative details that the relationship could one day possess.
Whereas on the other hand Love is a feeling of commitment and adoration for a person that you’ve put effort into and began to build a life with. It is a feeling backed by action and a desire to grow with and do your best for the person you’re with.
Look into your relationship and try to see where your emotional connection is stemming from. If your feelings are about sexual attraction, you’re likely falling into lust but if your feelings are built on a solid relationship that you’ve put work into, you’re likely falling in love.
Still, if you’re not quite sure, read on to learn more distinctions between the two terms.
Here are some of the possible characteristics of lust:
1. You Only Think About Sexual Desires
If you’re in a relationship with someone and the only thing you think about is sex, there is a good chance the connection will carry a focus on sexual relations.
2. Unhealthy Behaviors Are Common In Your Relationship
If you are in love with someone, you will likely do your best to be upfront and honest about everything to impress the person that you love and to show them who you really are but if you are only lusting after someone, your focus will be more self-centered and you may be only focused on sexual intimacy instead of relationship building. With unhealthy goals come unhealthy behaviors like lying, pretending to be someone you are not, and exaggerating the truth are some of the acts that may come up quickly in a lust-filled relationship.
3. You Don’t Want To Build a Connection
When you’re lusting after someone, you’ll have little to no desire to speak with them about anything beyond shallow topics. You’ll subconsciously do whatever it takes to avoid building a connection with that person. You may even know deep down that you do not want to build a connection with them. If the interaction ends on shallow topics or even ends in the bedroom, you are likely not in love.
What Makes Love?
For your feelings to be considered love, there are some characteristics that need to show through. Here are a few that you should recognize in your relationship:
1. Undeniable attraction towards the other person
There is a noticeable difference between love and sexual attraction, but it isn’t necessarily a physical attraction. This is talking about your attraction to the little things that your partner does. For example, maybe you fall in love every time your significant other laughs or smiles.
2. You’re willing to give more than take
When you love someone, you want to give them the world. You want to help them reach their goals. When you love someone, you want to see them happy before yourself. Lust relationships will cause you to have more of a self-focus instead.
3. You develop a deep connection
Lust relationships rarely go beneath surface level. This is because one or both parties are unable or unwilling to share things about themselves that will lead to meaningful and long-lasting connections. When you are in a relationship with someone else that involves love, you will have no problem speaking in-depth about yourself and trying to connect with the other person on a deeper level.
4. There is a clear lack of Judgment towards your partner
When you are in love, your relationship becomes more about understanding than judgment. Although there are healthy limits as to what your significant other can do before you have to pass judgment, you always try your best to see into the heart of the person that you are with. You work to recognize the good qualities in them rather than focusing on the less favorable qualities that they may have.
5. You’re always willing to support your significant other
Your willingness to support your partner through thick and thin is a big indicator of love. For example, imagine that you have been seeing someone for a while, and they have an opportunity to take a job in another state. If you love them, you will be supportive of their opportunity, and you will make the relationship work no matter what. In a lust relationship, the long-distance would likely not feel worth the effort to you.
6. You Want To Spend All Night Talking
Two people deeply in lust can easily stay up all night enjoying themselves in each other’s company, but it won’t be the stimulating conversation keeping them awake.
Two people in love, however, are just as interested in each other’s minds as they are in each other’s bodies. They can easily lose track of time when doing nothing more than talking to one another.
They’re never stuck for a topic of conversation and, even if they don’t agree on everything, they’re intrigued by each other’s minds.
Moral: Being in love and lust are the two different scenarios if looked from the correct way.
- Lust will only take you to the bed whereas love will take you to the place where you will be happy with your partner.
-Love and lust together in a relationship won’t make it worth living.
